A Thousand Ways Not To

by RebShang

Each Friday night before the waves of weariness come to overwhelm, I scribble on a sticky note the list of I-must-do’s and I’d-like-to-do’s for that weekend. Each Saturday morning arrives triumphantly, arousing my slumber earlier than preferred, and amending its presumption with an offer of white rays and a gentle breeze through my 15th storey window. I then proceed to accomplish or almost accomplish the list of do’s in its proper order.

But not today.

I could not blink away the slow sleep from my eyes this morning as I surveyed my muddled list. Unable to differentiate the necessary from the secondary, I began prioritizing based on what seemed logical in my current state of mind. Buy groceries? No. Do some chores? No. Arrange all twenty-seven skeins of yarn into my grandma wicker basket and crochet a monkey? Yes, please.

However, today’s monkey has been unlike any of my previous yarning projects. I have brought about into this world what Edison would say are “a thousand ways not to crochet a monkey”. The most interesting attempt thus far likens that of a limbless Ewok.

Here’s to finding that one way to end this monkey business.